blog.bagaki.com

I was drifting across the expansive internet and somehow came across this twisted article about a man and his mannequin fetish.

A man who has a history of smashing windows to indulge his fetish for female mannequins could draw a long prison term for his latest arrest. Ronald A. Dotson, 39, of Detroit faces up to life in prison if convicted of a charge of attempted breaking and entering at a cleaning-supply company in the Detroit suburb of Ferndale.

Here is a weird excerpt from the story that explicitly describes what the mannequins were wearing. I wonder if the pervert in question chose the specific mannequins based on their hair style and clothing choices or if he just likes a little plastic love of any style.

Dotson was arrested Oct. 9 after police say he smashed a window at a cleaning-supply company to get at a female mannequin dressed in a black and white French maid’s uniform. He had been out of prison for less than a week.

Dotson was arrested in Ferndale in July 2000 and later convicted for breaking and entering at a women’s clothing shop to get at a mannequin in a pink dress with bobbed hair.

FULL ARTICLE

If you are a man, have you ever wondered why that girl across the way is so sexy, or why you are so stupid? Well someone somewhere did something and came up with these conclusions:

About 40 per cent of the world’s population is infected with Toxoplasma gondii, including about eight million Australians.

Human infection generally occurs when people eat raw or undercooked meat that has cysts containing the parasite, or accidentally ingest some of the parasite’s eggs excreted by an infected cat.

This is what the men get:

“Infected men have lower IQs, achieve a lower level of education and have shorter attention spans. They are also more likely to break rules and take risks, be more independent, more anti-social, suspicious, jealous and morose, and are deemed less attractive to women.

And for the women:

“On the other hand, infected women tend to be more outgoing, friendly, more promiscuous, and are considered more attractive to men compared with non-infected controls.

“In short, it can make men behave like alley cats and women behave like sex kittens”.

So I guess in short, men feed your lady friends infected cat shit or uncooked meat and they will be like sex kittens, just don’t get any of this Toxoplasma Gondii or you are doomed to be a stupid, conformist, unattractive, hermit.

Parasite ‘turns women into sex kittens’ | NEWS.com.au

After months of promises and toil bagaki.TV is finally up. You can check out our site and see what we are up to. We have a flashy new logo! Well, we’re working on it. Check for major improvements early 2007! (Including navigation that WORKS)

We are playing with different ad mechanisms and such, but nothing obtrusive or unavoidable. The nice thing is that you can always skip the ad. We are playing with ads at the end of the features too, again making them avoidable. (Although we doubt you are going to want to miss them [wink])

Drop us some feedback, we love to hear what you have on your mind.

I would like to start this post by quoting the article being referenced:

In 1983, as the residents of Calcata, a small town 30 miles north of Rome, prepared for their annual procession honoring a holy relic, a shocking announcement from the parish priest put a damper on festivities. “This year, the holy relic will not be exposed to the devotion of the faithful. It has vanished. Sacrilegious thieves have taken it from my home.” Not since the Middle Ages, when lopped-off body parts of divine do-gooders were bought, sold, and traded, has relic theft been big news. But the mysterious disappearance of Calcata’s beloved curio is different.

With that opening paragraph I bet you are intrigued about what this “curio” might be? A sacred book or cloth I bet, I mean what else is there?

It was the foreskin of Jesus Christ, the snipped-off tip of the savior’s penis, the only piece of his body he supposedly left on earth.

WOW. I never expected that one. Now how does one come across the “snipped-off tip” of Jesus’ dick? Was there someone at the “snipping” that ran up and stole the small fleshy piece? What if you got caught? Back then you would be dismembered or tortured for such a thing. Imaging being in prison today and having to tell your cell mate you are “in here because I stole another man’s clipped foreskin.” Damn, how embarrassing.

More importantly, how does the Son of God forget such a thing when he leaves earth? You can read the entire article: Jesus’ foreskin on Slate.com

Courtney Chapman, a waitress dressed as a nurse at the Heart Attack Grill, holds up a triple bypass burger Friday, Dec. 1, 2006 in Tempe, Ariz. The barely year-old Tempe, Ariz., restaurant with its slogan “taste…worth dying for!” makes the “quadruple bypass burger,” estimated to be 8,000 calories, and it is served by waitresses in “nurse” outfits.

MORE GLUTTONY PLEASE.

In a weird twist of events this past week, Gurt T Luhrman, part-time blogger and self-help enthusiast, was formally charged today with not paying attention to celebrities lives. This stunning news comes just 3 or 5 days after musical bravado Lionel Richie’s daughter Nicole was charged for driving under the influence.

Rail-thin reality TV star Nicole Richie was charged last night with driving under the influence of drugs after she was seen going against traffic on a Southern California freeway, police said.

Now here is what Luhrman said that put him in the hot waters of the blogosphere

Too bad she didn’t go off an overpass! Stupid over-indulgent, silver-spooned American

It was just then that Gurt realized he too was an American, but by then it was too late. The tabloids as well as the blogging community picked up on his comments and suggested he be whipped by a large rubber phallus. The joke is on them. Gurt can take a phallus in the face all day long, its the pistol whippings that make him cower.

What would you do if you went to the beach and there we thousands and thousands of Doritos bags washed up on the shore? Clean them up, ignore it, save a whale? I know what I would do, find some stoners and watch the beach “clean itself”. Haha.

A cargo container that apparently fell from a ship washed up on the Outer Banks of North Carolina on Thursday and spilled thousands of bags of Doritos brand tortilla chips on the beach. People collected the chips, which were apparently still fresh due to their airtight packaging. It was unknown which ship had lost the cargo or to what port it was bound.

Check out more of the crispy, crunchy damage.

There’s a slow poison out there that’s severely damaging our children and threatening to tear apart our culture. The ironic part is, it’s a “health food,” one of our most popular.

Soy is feminizing, and commonly leads to a decrease in the size of the penis, sexual confusion and homosexuality. That’s why most of the medical (not socio-spiritual) blame for today’s rise in homosexuality must fall upon the rise in soy formula and other soy products. (Most babies are bottle-fed during some part of their infancy, and one-fourth of them are getting soy milk!)

Those are some pretty strong convictions. And even if soy is high in estrogen and it has a negative health impact on children, why is this guy gay bashing. I mean are you reporting or trying to influence and monger. And who is this guy that wrote this piece, we’ll have to see.

Homosexuals often argue that their homosexuality is inborn because “I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t homosexual.” No, homosexuality is always deviant. But now many of them can truthfully say that they can’t remember a time when excess estrogen wasn’t influencing them.

I just checked out Jim’s website, stop over and read his “about” page. Conclusion: this article has no compelling facts to prove soy is bad for children or adults. Its not even journalism, its opinion. Jump to the article.

Everyone can have their opinion, we have no objections to that. We do not want to sound like we are bashing this man, he is entitled. We would just like to express our conflict of viewpoint in our search for true journalism.

The current BusinessWeek.com article about new technologies for aging baby boomers is an interesting read on how companies are using technology to help the oldies age gracefully. Everything from cars with extra sensors so the too-old-to-drive crowd can still tear up the streets without the youngens worrying too much about getting hit to “Pill Pets” that die if you don’t take your pills.

One of the lab’s simplest yet most promising projects, Pill Pets, are stuffed animals with LCD screens that remind their owners when it’s time to take a pill or go to the doctor. If the senior fails to report back to the Pill Pet after performing that task, the creature will simulate sickness or death, prompting an emotional response.

The emotional response is probably: “Holy shit my Pill Pet died, that means I only have 20 minutes to live because I forgot to take my medication that keeps me alive”. Either that or deep depression, which would require more pills - which could lead to another Pill Pet death. I like this quote from some guy at Intel:

The group’s manager, Eric Dishman, says Intel is focused on removing the stigma from technology products designed to help the elderly. “Assistive technologies have always made you feel old and sick. They didn’t look like cool electronics, they looked like medical equipment,” he says. “[Future] systems will be cool and hip, and they won’t broadcast to the world ‘I’m sick.’”

I was actually hoping for devices with loud sirens and flashing lights if the old person next to me is about to croak. Ok, that is a bit morbid, but hey, I don’t want some old person slouching over dead on me while I’m riding the bus or heaven forbid browsing the pornographic section at my local headshop. Just some food for thought.

I’m on the road now for a few days, but fear not. I am making it my personal goal to post WHILE ON THE ROAD for a change. Usually I just give up after 10 minutes into my trip and stop posting for a while. Not this time! (I even have a surprise post for you). Here is a little something to start your workday, the most productive day of the week.

You know that kid from the recent apple commercials, the one who plays “the Mac“. His name is Justin Long, and this is his website. I’m honestly not impressed. His website sure doesn’t look like it was “made with a Mac”. I mean, look at the commercials, it would seem that everything done on a Mac turns out pretty and nice.

Word of the Day: Phalloplasty

I strongly urge you to stop and take a look at this article describing America’s failure to stay on-top in the world of broadband and fast internet. I was having a nice discussion with a friend a while back about this and it just pisses me off. There is no reason why American’s should be paying WAY TOO MUCH for WAY TO LITTLE in terms of speed and performance. I want IPTV, and without an infrastructure it won’t happen. Damn monopolies.

The United States is 15th in the world in broadband penetration, according to the International Telecommunication Union (ITU). When the ITU measured a broader “digital opportunity” index (considering price and other factors) we were 21st — right after Estonia. Asian and European customers get home connections of 25 to 100 megabits per second (fast enough to stream high-definition video). Here, we pay almost twice as much for connections that are one-twentieth the speed.

Here is something for all you “small device” user, the upcoming “blackberry thumb” epidemic. While the condition has been coined “blackberry thumb“, it should be known that this condition also affects those who use regular mobile phones for text messaging and other portable electronic devices.

“It’s a bit like the “Nintendo thumb” of the ’90s,” said occupational therapist Andrew Morton, referring to young people who spent hours battering hand-held video game controllers with their thumbs.

Morton, who specializes in hand therapy at the University Hospital in London, Ontario, said this problem was going to become more common, with increasing numbers of hand-held electronic devices with small buttons being used.

Hedge recommended preventive measures like holding the device comfortably in the hands and close to the body, and not typing for more than five minutes without a break.

There is good news though, Hyatt Hotels are now offering travelers the pampering they need to ease their “blackberry thumb”. How so? With a little massage goodness. I wonder if it comes with a happy ending?

Even if you don’t use a mobile device, it should be known that if you are happy, you will catch fewer colds. This seems to work for me, so I believe it.

A PAEDO seduced a girl of 12 — then lived in her bedroom for THREE MONTHS without her mother finding out.

Scott Jennings, 22, cut a giant hole in the bottom of the youngster’s divan bed then used it as a secret den to evade detection if somebody came into the room.

He systematically abused the girl. And when she went to school in the morning, Jennings slipped out of the house to find food. Jennings, of Ashton-under-Lyne, Gtr Manchester, befriended the girl on a bus last year.

He began chatting her up, persuaded her to give him her mobile phone number and then arranged a date.

When they met, Jennings said he had nowhere to live and confided that he was wanted by police for a minor dishonesty offense.

< < READ THE FULL STORY >>

Wow, and I say that for multiple reasons. First of all, this is a tragedy for the abused girl, I would wish this upon no-one and hope this man is punished accordingly. Secondly, it is a shame when my spell check finds errors in quoted text from a professional news source. Finally, what did this guy do when he had to go to the bathroom at 2am?

The definition of paedo for those wondering. Oh, and read the caption under the image on the screen shot. That is unaltered. “Pervert place…” That sounds like something off of a bad version of Monopoly. I say make him a eunuch.

With just around 30 minutes of work left for most of you, why not piss that time away on a few websites I have compiled to help you get paid to do nothing. Lets jump in…

Seeing eye dogs are so 1986. Why not bring your seeing impairment into the fashionable 00’s with a seeing eye horse. These unique miniature horses are way cooler than a seeing eye dog, and how cool would it be for everyone with vision to see a miniature horse take a shit in McDonalds.

Here is a fun game to waste a few more minutes. This is a chess styled game in which you are the knight and you fight off the pawns. Always good for about 10 minutes of paid “work time” [There is sound, but it can be turned off]

It looks like Chuckly Norris is in the news again, but this time with facts of his own. Too bad he wasn’t quoted as saying: “There is no theory of evolution, just Chuck Norris”. That would have been way cooler.

Alleged Chuck Norris Fact: “There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.” It’s funny. It’s cute. But here’s what I really think about the theory of evolution: It’s not real. It is not the way we got here. In fact, the life you see on this planet is really just a list of creatures God has allowed to live. We are not creations of random chance. We are not accidents.

This house rotates

Now I like good sushi as much as the next guy, but candy sushi? I just down know. I have never tried anything really “crazy” when I’ve had sushi, such as octopus. Do I really want to try octopus sushi candy? Well, I guess, just as long as the candy sushi actually tastes like real octopus.

If you have been living under a rock or are still using Windows 3.11 then you probably don’t know that the (second) browser war has been heating up for some time. For those of you not aware that Firefox and Internet Explorer have BOTH been updated, they have!!

Mozilla just released Firefox 2.0. I have been using it for a few days without any problems. A few of my extensions didn’t work, but just today 2 of them were updated to be compatible. The coolest new feature is the built-in spell check for online forms. (This is worth the upgrade itself)

Microsoft just released Internet Explorer 7.0. Honestly I cannot comment too much on this update. I know there are tabs and the new IE is more like Firefox or Opera but other than that. My concern with IE7 is computability with sites. I don’t know if it breaks sites. From what I hear though, the security updates are worth it, if you like a secure system. I am waiting to upgrade this browser, but then again I don’t ever use it so…

In a feat of strength that the world has not seen since Pat Robertson leg pressed two thousand pounds, Gurt T. Luhrman of Bagaki enterprises attempted to lift a superconducting cryo-cooled 600 Megahertz Nuclear Magnetic Resonance (nmr) spectrometer. The alleged event occurred when Mr. Luhrman, who was at the end of a recent publicity tour that included stops in Minneapolis, St. Paul, and Madison, was touring the Paul Bender Chemical Instrument Center at the University. Mr. Luhrman was reportedly bored with the official guide’s tour and decided to “spice up the tour Bagaki style.” There are no reports yet on whether or not his attempt was successful but experts are doubtful due to the magnets estimated weight of over one metric ton. If the reports of this feat of strength are true it would smash many of the current weight lifting records. A fellow tour member, who wished to remain anonymous (He asked to be referred to as Dude Adores Nmr or D.A.N.) refused to confirm Mr. Luhrman’s accomplishment of this feat but commented “I have no clue what Gurt would do after he lifted the spectrometer but his antics sure made the last part of that god awful tour bearable.” More on the story as it develops.