blog.bagaki.com

Boxhead

The game where you kill zombies that look like you but are a different color. You have a boxhead and all of the regular weapons: pistols, shotguns, uzi, grenades, and explosive barrels. Good for a few minutes of “am I really getting paid for this”. A timeless classic, it reminds me of a basic version of one of my favorite arcade games: Smash TV

Sober Santa

One of my favorite games out there. It will test your dexterity and patience. Pretend it is Christmas in March and see how loaded you can get the jolly fellow before you stumble off the roof. My best was 1265, something I’m proud of. Anything above 1000 points and this fat bastard is out of control. The key is to try to keep him in the center of the building, at least that what I tried doing. Too bad he’s drinking champaign, I always pictured Santa as more of a vodka guy, cheap vodka.

So I got another wonderful spam the other day from jolly Dick Bowles. He was trying to peddle erectile dysfunction tablets like so many other spammers. I just wasn’t sold. I mean with a name like that I just can’t trust the guy. Not that I need the pills (yet) I just need to be confident with the person I would buy them from. ED is a very serious problem, at least it is now that Pfizer has been pushing their “miracle drug” to the masses and their marketing is taking hold.

So I ask you, would you trust a man named Dick Bowles to sell you ED pills? I sure hope not. Stan, Herb, or Victor, now there are three men I would pay to fix my problem. So let me pose the question, who would you buy this “wonder drugs” from if you needed them?

Someone at Google is enjoying their ability to control what is displayed when you request directions on Google Maps. I find this rather amusing and quite creative. Maybe it will help this countries obesity issue. Read through the directions from Chicago to London.

On a totally random note I ran across this clever how-to article to create a wallet out of an old keyboard. I actually have an old keyboard that I found in my garage the other day when I was cleaning and I decided to keep it even though I knew it was not functional. I figured if anything I could use it as a prop in a bagaki.TV film or production. It would be perfect for a scene where someone smashes a keyboard to bits. I will let you know if this thing turns out.

Well unlike video cameras where the government is watching, there is always someone in the sky that is watching…. God Is Watching ™

Apparently Michael Jackson is at it again, this time working on a 50-foot robotic Michael that will roam the Las Vegas desert.

Michael Jackson is in discussions about creating a 50-foot robotic replica of himself to roam the Las Vegas desert, according to reports.

What is really disappointing is that is will shoot laser beams. Who cares about laser beams, I want to see thing rogue monster moonwalk and grab its crotch while chirping Jackson’s trademark scream.

It has now been claimed that his plans include an elaborate show in Vegas, which would feature the giant Jacko striding around the desert, firing laser beams.

If built, the metal monster would apparently be visible to aircraft as they come in to land in the casino capital.

I know this machine won’t really be roaming the desert on its own, but that is what I keep picturing. I want to see this colossal beast randomly shooting desert animals with its laser beams. Watch out kids, this is not a toy.

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I know biggpappa used to be quite the rider, I wonder if he has any tricks like this left in his bag? Hey Reginald, speaking of bikes, how is your new ride and your trip last weekend with your lady friend?

I was just running the numbers and so far in 2007 we have surpassed the entire yearly readership for 2006 by 8%. A pretty incredible feat if you ask me. While this month’s numbers are down compared to our banner month of Feb, things are still doing great. I know part of the reason for the slouch is the lack of postings this month, and my general lack of interest in the blog. I have been working very hard on a multitude of other projects and working at booking up my summer for more video work.

While the blog is in no immediate danger of disappearing anytime soon, it hasn’t been a top priority for the staff here. With last week’s launch of the new bagaki.TV website, behind the scenes work on several new shows, trying to align creative talent to continue to product higher quality programing, and the development of several yet unmentioned projects things could not be busier. And now that the weather is starting to remind me how much I enjoy being outside, my time resource is going to become even more stretched. Toss in the fact that Mr Bagaki is currently in plans to move our office to a large metropolis and planning behind a new studio is underway I cannot stress enough how important your continued support has been.

Amongst all of the blah blah above, we are also actively working on changing the format of the content on the blog. We are working to start producing more original stories and posts in lieu of the commentary on much of what is happening on the net today. While our commentary and zany stories will not go away, they will step down from the limelight to become filler to our private stash of creative nonsense.

So again, on behalf of bagaki.com and because Mr Bagaki obligates me to tell you, we greatly appreciate everything you have done for the bagaki.com community in helping us achieve the small online presence we have today. Thank you

Gurt T Luhrman
Editor, Cock

• Think the Nation’s Debt Doesn’t Affect You? Think Again
  He says if the country does not change course, the rest of the world could end up owning 15 trillion-dollars worth of the United States. That’s equal to the value of all American stock.
• Law Might Not Protect Good Samaritan - The Crime library
  Van Horn was in the front passenger seat of a car that slammed into a light pole at 45 mph on Nov. 1, 2004, according to the negligence lawsuit filed against Lisa Torti.

  Torti was a passenger in a car that was following behind the vehicle and stopped aft

• Vista error stickers for bus-shelter Vista ads
  Czech painter Jeremiah Palecek has created these Vista error message stickers (”Error: The Operation Completed Successfully”) that are the right size to stick over the Vista screens in bus-shelter ads and the like.
• Carl Sagan ; drugs & devastating insights
  “I am convinced that there are genuine and valid levels of perception available with cannabis (and probably with other drugs) which are, through the defects of our society and our educational system, un-available to us without such drugs.”
• The Daily Dish: Drugs and Toxicity
  One way to measure the dangers of various drugs is to examine how toxic the drug is at various levels. Can too much kill you? And how much is too much? Here’s an interesting article on what we know scientifically about the matter.
• No sex please, we’re daddy’s little girls
  In what is becoming a trend among conservative Christians in the United States, girls as young as nine are pledging to their fathers to remain virgins until they wed, in elaborate ceremonies dubbed “Purity Balls.”

If Ron Popeil and George Foreman can brand kitchen appliances then why can’t I? So you know what, we did. Introducing the Gurt T Luhrman Signature Breakmaker and Crouton Machine. We teamed with Oster, the world leader in bread machine technology to put together this incredible package. Imagine waking up every day to the wondrous smell of fresh baked bread in your very own kitchen. No more fumbling with pre-packaged bread, fighting that twisty-tie, or having to deal with the geriatric crowd at your local bakery. Now you too can be one of the millions of people who already enjoy the yet undetermined health benefits of our Gurt T Luhrman Signature Breakmaker & Crouton Machine.

As a benefit to our loyal readers we would like to offer this life changing machine to you before we release it to the general public. I bet you are thinking, “wow, a machine like this must cost twenty dollars”. Well think again, this one of a kind personally autographed Breadmaker & Crouton Machine can be yours for one easy payment of NOT $100, not $80, not even $70. You won’t pay $50, or $40, or even $30 today for this once-in-a-life-time life changing appliance. This health inspiring, fresh bread baking machine can be yours for only one simple and easy payment of $19.95.

And if you order today and promise not to sue us we will throw in the original owners manual with bread recipes for free. This is a $2.00 value, completely FREE.

Don’t settle for imitations or machines that only promise fresh bread. The Gurt T Luhrman Breadmaker & Crouton Machine promises a bread experience you will never forget. Be like the millions of other people who also have a twice used breadmaker sitting on their shelf, but have one that is also a crouton machine.

(disclaimer: crouton machine will not actually make croutons)

So about seven months ago I received a letter from my local monopolistic cable empire telling me how I could save a bunch of money if I signed up for cable along with my internet service. Since I don’t watch television, and at the time didn’t even own a television, I never had cable. The deal was I could sign up for basic cable for FREE for six months and because I would be “bundling” cable and internet I would be “saving” $10 a month. So here was my train of thought… sign up for 6 months, save $60, then cancel and everything is back to normal. It wasn’t quite like that. First off, after all was said and done and I was paying taxes and surcharges on cable AND internet I was only saving ~$5 a month. So over the six month period I would stand to save only $30. Fine, $30 is still money in my pocket.

So I called last month to cancel, and after numerous issues with customer service and them screwing up my account royally, I got everything straitened out. The other day I get my bill and on there is a “downgrade fee” for $19.99 to have a truck come out and take a filter off my line or put one on, whatever they do. So now my $30 is down to $10. If I take into count the hour and a half I spent fixing my account and dealing with 5 customer service reps over 4 phone calls I think I lost money on the deal.

It was funny too, the last rep I spoke with was a very nice lady who took care of me and set everything strait BUT, I think one of the first sentences out of her mouth was, “and no one tried to put in into another deal”. I hate the monopolistic cable companies in this country anyway, but there deals are usually not as sweet as they sound. I should have known better, I follow this industry like a hawk and know how money driven they are. They are not about giving us excellent services at a reasonable price, they are all about squeezing every last penny out of the American consumer.

My solution to you…. bagaki.TV, this is our entire purpose.