Archive for September, 2005

THE FINAL COUNTDOWN

Posted September 30th @ 12:28 am by Gurt T. Luhrman

the final 10 daysAs we now embark on the final 10 days of the countdown, I would like to continue to build the anticipation for the big day. Check back to the blog and to bagaki.com daily for updates and information about the big day and all that we have planned. The 10th is a Monday, so make sure you are all sick from work that day, it is time to celebrate.

Keep your eyes peeled for the original characters from bagaki.com throughout the next ten days; you just never know where they might pop up. Along with the original cast, we will be introducing many new characters to the bagaki family. Our first family member we would like to introduce is Steel Ferreli. Steele is a young chap from Wisconsin with more than just ants in his pants. He is the alluring porn star and ladies man that women just can’t get enough of.

Find out more about Steele and his friend in the upcoming months as your journey at bagaki.com begins.

Birthday Madness

Posted September 29th @ 12:53 pm by Gurt T. Luhrman

diamond daveWith the ever-exciting 10 day mark encroaching upon us, I thought it would be fun to see who shares a birthday with bagaki on the 10th. The results are in, bagaki.com shares its birthday with…. the one and only Diamond Dave. Here is a nice photo to look at while we waste some of your time with this pointless post.

Dave aside, there are a few other celebrities that have the same birthday, but who really cares. I want to know why society focuses some much of its attention on famous people and their lives. If we could take this focus and put it on the people (and corporations) that are destroying our country, things I feel, would be a bit better. Lets reflect now with the bagaki prayer.

Important Link

Posted September 27th @ 12:28 pm by Gurt T. Luhrman

Anytime a website asks you to register, simply try this site first for a username and password, it works really good. BugMeNot.com

Lets fuck these data collecting assholes and free the web from corporate control.

My Grandma Stole My Dildo

Posted September 27th @ 12:15 pm by Gurt T. Luhrman

grandma stole my dildoWhat a sick and twisted world we live in today. You can’t walk alone down a dark alley at night, you can’t lurk in people’s bushes and look in their homes, and you can’t put your dildo in storage in your grandmother’s basement.

stolen from a box in the basementAfter receiving a dildo as a gag-gift, and having my mother find it in the trunk of my car (which is another story all together), I placed the 12″ classic dong in a box to be forgotten about until needed at a future event. Upon returning to the box several years later, where the dildo once lay, and to my shock it was gone. I spent 45 minutes that summer afternoon searching through every box in my grandmother’s basement, only to come to the conclusion that my dildo was gone. But where could it have disappeared too? No one else in my family knew that I had hid this flaccid object at my grandmother’s house, besides, no one ever went into my grandma’s basement, they had no purpose there. After much deliberation about where it could have gone I came to the frightening conclusion, that yes, my grandma stole my dildo.

To this day that has been no sign of the rubber cock.

Find Elite Singles In Your Area / Go Sign My Pit

Posted September 24th @ 9:56 am by Gurt T. Luhrman

bagaki.com countdown biatchSo I was sifting through my email this morning and I noticed a few subject lines that drew my attention. Between the usual penis enhancement/Russian spam/prescription drug ads, I noticed that there were ELITE SINGLES in my area. This is a relief; I am getting too tired of the regular people that I have to deal with. Along with the elite that are lurking around (much to my relief) I have been selectively chosen to “go and sign my pit”. Although I am not sure what this means, I am very excited about the possibilities of that statement. Who is this person, and what is their “pit”. I am starting to wonder if this is some type of sexual advance via email, but am still unsure. Either way, I would like to sign one of those elite’s pits, just because it seems like the natural combo.

Presenting: The Bagaki Archives

Posted September 23rd @ 1:33 am by Gurt T. Luhrman

17 days leftTo get everyone ready for the big day, we are officially releasing the bagaki archives. You can visit the archives and relive all of the original bagaki.com sites. We have also added a link to the archives in the “Entrances” section on the right column. If you have not familiarized yourself with the “Entrances”, please do so, as this will be the main launch point for future bagaki.com entry points.

We have also updated our little icon for the website. If you use firefox (or IE, but IE doesn’t seem to update them as nicely as firefox) you will notice a cool little “b” as the icon for the website in the address bar. You will also get the “b” if you bookmark this or any of the bagaki.com pages.

Enjoy!!!

Gurt

SLOW LOADING

Posted September 22nd @ 1:31 am by Gurt T. Luhrman

just wondering, is anyone else noticing slow loading of the right content on the blog. the posts seem to load first along with the top picture, but it takes a few seconds for the rest to load. does anyone else experience this? i just upgraded the blog software, which i thought might take care of this, but with no luck. i will have to see what happens

on another note, lighting should be on the way for a special project we are working on. if the lights arrive today, you can expect a big surprise in the follow weeks. (just trying to build some suspence here, play along with me)

UPDATE: We have tracked down the problem, and things should be working good again. It had to do with our radio server being down. We have enabled the stream again, and things seems to be loading like they should.

i think were are down to 18 days, but who is keeping track

Posted September 22nd @ 1:27 am by Gurt T. Luhrman

18 i thinkSo here is the deal. I took these cool photos of this hunk of meat i purchased, but am unable to upload them to the website. See the problem is that my card reader is no longer functioning, and it is needed to transfer the images from my camera to the website. So, until i can afford a new one, no new photos from the camera. On another note, i have been adding new stuff behind the scenes literally every day. the launch should be the biggest thing since, well, since my buddy passed out at the bar, fell off his stool and cut open his head on the bar.

21 DAYS: tons of cool stuff

Posted September 19th @ 7:28 pm by Gurt T. Luhrman

ballgagWe are going to try something new here. We have received requests for interesting links by many of our readers. We wanted to try something a little different. Instead of just listing the link, and maybe a crappy description of what it links to, we would try this….

I think of all of the links today, this one is probably my favorite. Recently, the patent on the NES (Nintendo Entertainment System) ran out. What does this mean? This means that you can buy a BRAND NEW NES. Messiah Entertainment is now producing a slick remake of the classic system, including wireless!!

Have you ever tried to forget something, but just couldn’t? Maybe it’s that ugly chick (or guy) you slept with, or maybe it was grandpa giving grandma a breast exam. Either way, your problems are solved. Scientists are working on replicating the movie Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

If this isn’t freaky, I don’t know what is. Imagine yourself, wrapped in medical bandages, your lover beating you with a leather whip made from the kid that used to live next door. Ah yes, how romantic. Note, look for the tubes to insert for breathing, WTF. Also, look around this website, there are a lot of weird things.

There are many jobs out there that I wonder how people get or end up with. Are these their dream jobs, or do they just fall into them. This is one of those jobs. How do you get to be a model for ball-gags? If anyone can tell me, let me know, I have a buddy who just loves these things.

I was conversing the other day with a buddy of mine. I was telling him how I wanted a walking cane, particularly made from an elephant penis. He said there was no such thing, which after my research he may be correct. I do know that I have seen canes from animal penis, and after some diligent search I have found this. This is exactly what I have been looking for. If anyone out there would like to purchase this for me, I will use it, I promise.

So this is the prototype of the new link postings. I will be giving a little more info with the links. I will try this a few more times, hopefully refining it a bit. If any of you have suggestions or comments, please let us know.

RADIO UPDATE

Posted September 18th @ 3:03 am by Gurt T. Luhrman

kiteMixed news on the radio server. Nothing bad happened to the server hardware itself, everything is runny properly and there have been no power failures. It appears that our router needed to be reset, along with our modem. Our ISP has changed our IP address, and we are waiting to see why the change in the addresstook place. So for the time being, we will no longer be broadcasting anything on the radio until things settle down.

peace and grease

Kellor M Reet
IT Director / Kite Enthusiast

RADIO SERVER DOWN, REASONS UNKNOWN

Posted September 17th @ 10:36 am by Gurt T. Luhrman

Saturday, September 17, 2005
10:28 AM CST

We have just been informed that our radio server is not responding. We are currently looking into the matter and will get this issue resolved as soon as possible. As of 8:30 AM CST this morning all hardware was operative. Current possible reasons for this outage include: operating system failure, hardware failure (i.e. hard drive), power outage (which would have resulted in a system shutdown), or no one really cares.

Because we have no listeners, we enjoy spending hundreds of dollars every month to bring you the best in internet radio. By broadcasting live on the internet, we are able to bring our listeners new and unheard music. This is a great outlet for groups looking to expand their listener base and add new fans.

If you are a group looking to attract new listeners or gain recognition, we are NOT what you are looking for. If you would be interested in having bagakiRADIO play your music, please contact an account specialist at your earliest convenience. We are always looking for new music to play for no one to listen to

Regards,

Kellor Reet
IT Director / Janitor

Impacted stool is not cool: 23 days until your final judgement

Posted September 17th @ 10:19 am by Gurt T. Luhrman

de'amnFROM THE ARCHIVES…
(names have been changed to protect the guilty)
[space for format reasons only]

Bagaki Enterprises to form and acquire bagaki.com

CITY, State – April 12th, 2001 — bagaki.com announced today that the newly formed Bagaki Enterprises would be overtaking all current bagaki.com operations. Bagaki.com, the site that promotes ‘puddin time’, and also the host of the popular internet radio station: RADIO bagaki said today that “we feel that this acquisition will better us not only financially, but equivocally – allowing for a rapid expansion of current projects, with the intend to delve into new areas of interest as well”

Gurt Luhrman, current president and chairman of bagaki.com stated the following when asked if he will continue to provide his leadership after the acquisition – “I feel the takeover will be a significant step forward in the future of bagaki.com, and I plan on being there till the end. We have built the start of something of an even greater dimension, and effective May 1st, 2001, I will become President of Bagaki Enterprises. I plan to continue my work with bagaki.com as well as with our newly formed mother company – Bagaki Enterprises”

Bagaki Enterprises plans on further developing bagaki.com and shape it into a more user friendly and effective web interface. For more information on Bagaki Enterprises or bagaki.com, please contact:

Gurt T Luhrman
President – Bagaki Enterprises
info_at_bagaki.com

URGENT: only a few days left to bid

Posted September 15th @ 10:05 pm by Gurt T. Luhrman

I know this will strike a cord in the hearts of all of my readers. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity… my dreams have been answered

spam to the rescue

Posted September 15th @ 2:06 pm by Gurt T. Luhrman

spamburgerSo i was visiting a buddy’s blog and went to post a comment. To my surprise, I mean to no surprise, there was a spam message disguised as a comment. So out of sheer curiosity I clicked on the link to where in this tangled mess of spam sites it would take me…. this is what i got out of the experience…

(1) Hot African Love Portal
(2) Tools for Empowerment
(3) NO MORE BRAIN CANCER
(4) Your One-Stop Shop for computer repair and spiritual healing, oh yeah, and garage sales

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